This is a true story..or maybe it’s not..or, the fabrication of a myth for the purpose of storytelling & to create a good ending to a long story…

November 22, 2009

To appreciate this posting, one must understand a few things about Monte, Sharyl, Kathy and Jared.

In one way, Monte and Sharyl were like a cat and dog.  They could bicker like no other couple, but were also greatly devoted to each other.  In their later life, they also had a complex relationship that goes beyond the scope of this blog.  Near the end of the individual lives of Kathy, Sharyl and Monte, most were accepting of these complexities.  As anyone who has led a long life knows, love and relationships can be complex things.

Jared was a very beloved brother of Monte, a very beloved brother-in-law of Sharyl and a very beloved uncle to Kathy.  Kathy took great solace knowing she would be buried next to Jared and next to her Grandparents, John and Zelma Ellis.

Below is a picture of the tombstones of Kathy and Jared.   Note, Kathy’s grave site is adorned with angels and Jared’s grave site is adorned with out of doors items.

Sharyl decided to be cremated prior her death in 2007.  After Sharyl passed away in 2007, her cremains may or may not have been buried at Kathy’s grave site.   And if it did happen that Sharyl’s remains were buried with Kathy, she would have also taken great solace in being returned to her daughter, Jared and John and Zelma.

Monte also decided to be cremated prior to his death.  Monte also had somewhat of a request for his own ashes.

Below is a close up of the grave site of Kathy, the daughter to Monte and Sharyl.

Under Monte’s request with what to do with his cremains, only a real few requests were made.  It was not that he cared more where they went, but more about where they did not go.  He made it known a few sites where his ashes could be spread, so on October 25, 2009, his son Eric, and two of his cohorts Mark and John, took it upon themselves to accomplish this task.  That is, if it ever really happened.

October 25, 2009 was a beautiful day.  The fall temperature was just right and the sun was shining with no clouds in sight.  A better day could not have been created.   The first stop in this true story, if it is true, was Kathy’s grave site.  Eric thought Monte, or the majority of Monte, would like to be returned to the earth along with his beloved daughter, wife, parents and brother.

So if this event did happen, an even such such as this might have happened:

Mark drove John, Eric and Monte to the grave site.  Eric said to Mark, “Be sure to park as close as possible as you can and make sure it’s on the correct side of the grave.” Later, Mark rightfully pointed out that really, there was only one side to even park.

Eric then climbed out of the SUV with a small shovel at his side, telling Mark and John, “We have to hurry because if we get caught, we could get in trouble.”  Eric then, may have or may not have, quickly dug a small hole in Kathy’s grave, to the left (Monte’s preferred direction) of where Sharyl may or may not have previously been buried.  He then returned to Mark’s SUV and pulled a clear plastic bag holding Monte from the black, plastic cremains case and returned to the grave site.  Eric may have said to Mark, “I left the case in the car because any one who saw it would know what it was and what we were up to.”

Most of Monte may then have been poured into the small hole and afterward, Eric returned the plastic bag to the SUV.  If this event did happen, no one present received a face full of ashes similar to that seen in “The Big Lebowski.”  When he returned to the grave site, he saw the hole had not yet been filled in.  Being that Eric was with a pounding hangover from the night before, he said to Mark, “Jesus, the least you could have done is fill in the god damned hole for me since I have a hangover.”  Mark’s reply could have been, “Well, I thought since he was your Dad, it would be a personal thing for you.”  Eric may have replied, “I don’t give a shit, it’s a goddamned hole,” to which Mark replied, “In that case, I will tamp it down for you if you like.”

So Eric filled the hole in and when the dirt was all back in, Mark exerted himself by tamping the dirt back down.  While Mark was tamping the dirt down, Eric could have started saying, “Shit, shit, shit.”

When Mark heard Eric saying multiple “shits, ” he thought  Eric had grown upset with him and stopped tamping the dirt down.  Eric then pointed out to Mark and John what he had noticed in front of him, while Mark was tamping the dirt down.  The below picture is what Eric saw when he looked up while Mark was tamping the dirt down:

Yes, in Eric’s haste in possibly burying his father’s remains, the wrong grave may have been selected.

After the initial shock, the three cohorts then started to discuss how appropriate this event truly was and that Monte, Sharyl, Kathy and Jared would have truly enjoyed to have been there to see this.  Now, Zelma may have been a bit perturbed, but she would have quickly forgiven her grandson for such behavior.

Mark even pointed out that it was pretty appropriate Monte was further from Kathy’s angels and closer to Jared’s wildlife and just out of grabbing distance from Sharyl.

The rest of Monte may then have been spread at this location,

and this location,

Monte, Sharyl, Kathy and Sharyl’s sister Susan, dug up oak trees from this very area and transplanted them in the front yard to Monte and Sharyl’s Banner home.  The trees thrived and are quite lovely and were of great pride to Monte and Sharyl.

More of Monte’s remains were spread near the base of the trunks to two huge Blue Spruce trees in their yard as well.  Years ago during a long drought, Monte would carry buckets of rainwater to these two Blue Spruce trees to make sure they survived.

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